PARENT

Parent Pressure: An Editorial

In Grade 3, I had a teacher who brought in a puppet once a week to talk to the class about peer pressure. This puppet taught us how to say 'no' to our friends and how to make our own decisions based on morals and ethics. I believe that all of those who participated in this class have easily been able to stick up for themselves against their peers from that year on. However, not all of them know how to stand up to the pressures their parents impose upon them.

These days we see commercials for 'Baby Genius' books, cassettes, and video games all claiming to make your child smarter. While these kids are busy studying Mozart at the ripe age of 3, they are missing out on all of the normal social experiences that kids need most.

Technology certainly does not help in the matter. Scientists have now developed a method for creating designer babies. You can have the perfect child before it is even born! Not unlike in the movie Gattaca and Aldous Huxley's Brave New World, we are able to unnaturally manipulate a fetus' genetics so that the child will be the ideal baby. Like what happened with genetically modified foods, this could potentially cause more diseases and sensitivities in our children when they grow old. By choosing whether or not parents prefer a boy or girl whom is tall or short, blond or brunette, we are changing the diversity of our species.

An enormous part of this fad is competition. When I was younger, I competed in activities such as team sports. As a teenager, I am expected to compete academically with people all over the world in order to be accepted into university.

Adults compete for wages, promotions, social status and material goods. Humans are constantly in competition with peers; it quickly becomes a natural part of our lives whether we realize it. Now, social status for adults does not simply include large houses, expensive clothing and nice cars but also having a more gifted child.

My question is this: can you make a child gifted or does this happen naturally? Psychologists have been arguing nature versus nurture for decades and have not reached agreement on much.

Ample anecdotal evidence exists. "I have three older children who were all brought up the same. When they were younger they all had very different perspectives when it came to the desire for learning and understanding the world around them. My husband and I did not pressure them to learn any more than they wanted to and as the kids, they all excelled academically in their respective areas," stated Kit Wilton (my mom) of Waterloo, Ontario. In our case, pressure put on my older sister, my brother and me was completely self-imposed. My parents did not push us to do anything but rather guided us. I appreciate them very much for this.

The most important things that kids need to learn are not Mozart, which is what school is for, but morals, manners and respect. A parent's main job should be to guide children rather than pressuring them with unreasonable expectations.